It was three in the morning and Sharva was sitting on a bench outside an emergency ward. She had rested her head against the wall and had closed her eyes. She had interlocked her fingers. Her face looked absolutely calm.
On the other side, Sonakshi was filling some forms. Suddenly Dada came there and placed a glass of tea in front of Sonakshi. Sonakshi looked at the tea and then said “I don’t feel like it Dada!”
Dada said softly “You and me! We both know what is going to happen Sonakshi! Whatever happens next! We will have to gather our courage for that.”
Sonakshi took a deep breath and then looked at Dada. Her eyes were filled with tears. She said in a choked voice, “What is it Dada? What is she being punished for? Yesterday she was so happy that Sharva got admission in such a good college. She was saying that she never expected that this girl would get admission in even a B-grade college and now all this Dada! Why? Why?”
Dada looked at Sharva who was sitting in one place, absolutely quiet like a statue. Sonakshi said, “Whenever Sharva is so quiet! I feel very scared Dada! Only Di could handle her quietness. Now how will we handle this quietness!”
Dada put his hand on her shoulder and said, “Everything will be fine Sonakshi!”
Before anyone could say anything, a girl who looked one or two years older than Sharva and whose hair was cut very short came and stood there. Dada looked at her and then said, “Nik! All the preparations have started, right?”
Nik nodded and then looked at Sharva. He said, "She has become quiet again? That means there will be a big problem now, right Dada!"
Dada said in irritation, "You go to her! Whatever has to happen will happen later."
When Nick became quiet, Dada shook his head. Suddenly the doctor came out of the same room outside which Sharva was sitting. Seeing the doctor outside, Sonakshi, Dada and Nick also ran towards that side.
Doctor Abhishek stood in front of Sharva. He said "Sharva!" Sharva opened her eyes. Then she slowly stood in front of the doctor. Sonakshi, Dada and Nick also came and stood nearby. Dr. Abhishek said, "Nandini wants to meet you. Go and meet her!"
Sharva nodded yes and started going inside when Dr. Abhishek said "Sharva!"
Sharva stopped but she did not look at Abhishek. Abhishek took a deep breath and turned towards Sharva. He said, "Nandini has very little time left. We had given her only three months but she survived for seven months. Now... let her go. She is in a lot of pain."
Sharva's fists clenched. She rubbed the back of her neck and then she opened the door of the room without saying anything and went inside. Sonakshi put her hands on her face and started sobbing. Dada hugged her and Sonakshi started crying. Nick also started stroking her back while crying. Tears started flowing from Dada's eyes too.
In the room, when Sharva reached right in front of the bed, Nandini was sitting leaning against the pillows. She had put a warm cap on her head, but it was clearly visible that not a single hair was left on her head.
Sharva looked at his mother without any expression and Nandini smiled. She called Sharva to her with a gesture.
Sharva went straight and lay down next to her mother. She put the flute on Nandani's stomach.
Nandani smiled and ran her hand through her hair and said, "You don't even like anyone breathing in your bed, but you lie down so close to me!"
Sharva said in a deep voice, "No one else is allowed to touch my hair."
Nandani straightened her pillow and lay down completely. Sharva put his face on her chest. Nandani said, "Control yourself after I leave Sharva! You know that! Your studies have always been a matter of concern for me!"
Sharva said without any emotion, "I am the best in Maths, Language and Computer!"
"But you pass borderline in other subjects! Last time you almost failed in Physics...", Nandani said, "And who fails in Environment Sharva!"
Sharva did not say anything and hugged her mother more. She said in a cold voice “Is it necessary for you to go?”
Nandini smiled and said “If it was in my control, I would never go, Om!”
Sharva became silent. Nandini lovingly called him Om. Even today she was calling him by this name.
Nandini said “Some things are never in our control Om. No matter how much we plan! Whatever life has planned for us, it will happen in the end, no matter how much we try.”
Burying his face in Nandini’s shoulder, Sharva said “If you go, no one will be with me. I don’t want to lose you, Mama!” Nandini’s eyes became moist. Suddenly she said “Om! I am sorry!”
When Sharva did not say anything, Nandini said in a choked voice, “When I first came to know about you, I did not want to let you come into this world. For that I am really really sorry child! I wanted to punish you for a mistake that was never yours!”
While saying this, tears started flowing from Nandini's eyes and started getting absorbed in the pillow. She then said further, “But You came and completed me. You filled the emptiness inside me. Thank you so much for that Om!”
Sharva closed her eyes. She was feeling very tired but she could not sleep even if she wanted to. This insomnia was the most terrible thing for her.
Nandini got up slowly and kissed Sharva’s face and took Sharva in her embrace. Both mother and daughter slept like that for some time.
Then suddenly Nandini said to Nandini “Sharva! I have four last wishes! Will you fulfill them?”
Sharva opened her eyes. She bowed her head slightly and Nandini smiled. Then she told Sharva her four wishes.
After a while, Sharva was lying in the room, hugging her mother. There was silence in the room. Suddenly, a loud beeping sound started coming from the Clio machine and Sharva’s breathing became deep. She held Nandini tightly as if Nandini would stop if she held her like this. She tightened her grip with the loud beeping sound but as soon as the sound of the Clio machine subsided, Sharva’s grip on Nandini loosened. Sharva’s breathing became deep. Her eyes were completely blank but her hands were trembling. Sharva was now panting. She closed her eyes for a moment and then opened them.
Then she got up and kissed Nandini’s forehead and said “I love you Mama! You are the best mom in the world! I know you will always be with me! Always!”
Saying this, she took out the silver locket hanging around her neck. The locket had a damru with a Rudraksha inside it. A trident was made just above the damru and Mahadev’s third eye was made right in the middle of the trident.
Sharva took Nandini’s hand and rubbed it on the locket. Then he put Nandini’s hand on his forehead. She closed her eyes and stood absolutely still like a statue for a while. After that, she placed Nandini’s hand comfortably on the bed and covered Nandini with a white sheet.
After that, she came out of the room with blank eyes.
As soon as she came out, Sonakshi stood in front of her with red eyes. Dada and Nick were also standing right behind her.
Sharva took a deep breath and said, “Dada! Inform the neighborhood and...complete all the preparations for the funeral. Mama’s funeral will be done today after sunrise!”
Sonakshi started crying again and hugged Sharva. Dada also started wiping tears from his eyes. Nick also started crying. Sharva was standing absolutely silent. Her eyes were empty and not even a single tear fell from them.
She was just.....quiet!!!!
It was nine in the morning and clouds were covering the sky. It was drizzling lightly.
Nandini’s last rites were completed and Sharva lit the pyre again. The pyre was lit. Sharva bowed his head.
Sonakshi and many other people including Dada-Nick were standing behind him. A huge crowd had gathered there and all of them were crying.
Sharva’s eyes were empty. Not even a single tear fell from her eyes. She was looking at the pyre with light blinking eyes. There was a terrible calmness on her face. She was silent! Absolutely silent....
The fire of the pyre was in her eyes I was also burning with jealousy. Suddenly Sharva clenched his fists and Nandini’s voice echoed in his ears, “My first wish is that you go back home! You go to Arya Garh and meet your father. I wish he sees you! Let us present you to the world as our daughter!”
Sharva’s fists opened and he closed his eyes and folded his hands in front of Nandini’s funeral pyre.
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